Wednesday, December 25, 2019

Merry Christmas 2019

8 months ago, I was going to commit suicide. A friend/hero saved my skin (see blogs below) and in August we came to Halifax to visit him.....4.5 months later on Christmas Eve literally we arrived here to live!!

We left London Ontario Dec 21,2019.

Friday, November 22, 2019

Without risk, there is no reward. Do not give up hope. Keep trying.

If you been following this blog you will know that I went from being suicidal, miserable, in such severe chronic pain 24/7 365 to actually having a quality of life. All from being a fan of a TV show. Crazy huh?

But lets look at actually what happened.

Sunday, October 27, 2019

Ending my life would have stopped any chance of this happening!!

In the end of April 2019, I was planning my suicide. I was 8-12 hours away. I am sorry if this upsets you, or your thoughts of me wanting to die thinking I am a coward for wanting to cash out, or you simply just understood the severity of my life.

I don't want to write how bad my life was. Because

Friday, August 30, 2019

Bubbles, aka Mike Smith saved my life! From fan to friend......Never give up HOPE

I have looked death more than once right in the face. I was in a place of shame, misery, pain and suffering and when doctors here told me there is nothing we can do for you, and the medication will end your life sooner than would break anyone after being sick 15 years.

And all of this changed from a TV show.....fucking crazy isn't it?

I am confident you have at least heard of

Tuesday, June 4, 2019

Stem Cell Treatment

I went from not wanting to be here to being on a private jet flying to NYC all because a friend offered to help for no reason other than being a kind decent human being by giving a very sick friend HOPE.

Yes, that is where it began.

Friday, May 10, 2019

Go Fund Me started by Mike Smith aka Bubbles from The Trailer Park Boys

If you know me personally, or follow my journey, than you are well aware its NOT just cluster headaches I live with. It is much ore than that.  Chronic migraines too, as well as Sciatica, neuropathic pain and so much more than that. Pain is pain. In many forms,levels and severity. In 14 years I haven't gone a day without some sort of severe chronic pain. But this isn't abut trumping anyone's pain.

I have become friends with Mike Smith, the actor who plays Bubbles on the TV/Movie series The Trailer Park Boys. Aside form being a huge fan, I am also his friend. Yes, he means that much to me. If Mike was a plumber, he would still be thought of equally.

Now here is the harsh part to read but true.

December 31,2008 when I jumped in front of a bus in Miami, I thought then I was at the lowest of low I had reached. Since this past September, my last appointment with the pain clinic was my last and final hope. But they told me there is no more tests to be done, no more referrals, n more nothing. and Sir" We are very sorry, we do not know what is wrong with you and btw, the medications you are on will end your life sooner if you continue to stay on them". Before anyone worries, they are NOT narcotics. Narcotics do not help this pain. I have been offered everything.

Everyday, I got a bit worse. Not much but day after day, week after week, month after month, And after years of fighting an additional pain on top of all the other things were taking a toll on me mentally and physically.

My wife worried everyday, wondering if I would still be here when she got home from work. I would tell her, don't be sad when I am gone one day. Be happy I am no longer in pain. My fiend who passed away last month understood this. His passing, I wished it was me.

I am not depressed. I am in a circumstance that would kick anyone's ass. Isolation is probably the worst. It has only added to my heart break.

I was really struggling bad. And one day a friend was like "Hey Man, how ya doing?". And I basically verbally diarrhea all over him. I could have lost a friend by dumping this all over him. And at that exact moment. it could have been anyone on the other end listening to me cry. That person was Mike Smith. I do not refer to him as an actor, a celebrity or a Trailer Park Boy. He is Mike to me. I love him.

Mike reached out to me as a friend and offered help. At first I was like thanks Bro, ad then realized he was serious. Dead serious. The very first thing he said to me was " I don't want any acknowledgement, I don't want this about me". He said . "I am going to do everything in my power to help you". An offer no one has given me after I lost all hope.

Mike literally saved my life. As much as I love my wife, she can't fix or heal or take my pain away. Only sit there in horror.and watch me suffer helpless. My wife deserves way better than this. She deserves a healthier version of me.

Within a couple days, a Go Fund Me was up, he is making  personalized videos for fans on (links for all below). and is doing everything in his power to help.

I am still in total shock, awe and we both are so humbled by his offer, kindness and generosity.

In the past few days of watching the video,ad watching donations come in, we are so appreciative of every dollar raised, every tweet, Facebook share, everything that everyone has contributed. Kristen and I are so grateful and humbled. Thank you everyone!

I make less than $10,000 a year on CPP disability.  So any dollar raised means as much to us as much as more than 1 dollar raised. Equally grateful no matter what amount. I know $5 for some is a lot as it would be to us.

We plan on heading to NYC to a friend of Mike's who does Stem Cell Therapy to try to help me. This Doctor has taken great interest in my case and wants to try to give me a better quality of life. We both feel in our hearts we won the lottery. I know I struck gold with my wife but twice? Yes, I am eternally grateful to this man, and my wife for struggling with me by my side and never once ran off like a coward.

Not all super hero's wear capes. Some wear thick glasses and love kitties.

Here is the links.

CTV London News story CLICK HERE


To book BUBBLES for video message CLICK HERE

Friday, April 12, 2019

Celebrate the strong women, not the weak cowards!

First, Happy Birthday to my best friend, my UNSUNG HERO, my everything. My wife.  Today is her birthday. Today, I celebrate one of the strongest women I ever known next to my mom.

Monday, March 11, 2019

I loved a friend I never met.

I get contacted from people from all over the globe. Whether they have cluster headaches, migraines or just another rare disease and health issues. Yes, I am contacted by all sorts of different people.

So a couple years ago a

Saturday, March 9, 2019

Slowly Slipping Away.

No, it's not the song from the Toronto band Harem is me, unfortunately.

This is a subject I rarely talk about and as things get worse I feel it's imperative to write it down before it gets worse.

I am talking about....

Sunday, March 3, 2019

I was the first

I am a barber by trade. I went to school in 1992, got my apprenticeship out of school. Completed the 3500 hours required. I wrote my test and became licensed in May 1995. Even before I got my license I knew one day that I have my own

Wednesday, February 27, 2019

Hero's stay, cowards run!

I am pretty confident any person who is sick has dealt with heroes and cowards. So which one are you?

Thursday, January 17, 2019

Letting go

Accepting someone's behavior and path is just only part of letting go. Choosing to support that behavior is not letting go, it is enabling it.

There came a point in my life when letting go is