Friday, August 30, 2019

Bubbles, aka Mike Smith saved my life! From fan to friend......Never give up HOPE

I have looked death more than once right in the face. I was in a place of shame, misery, pain and suffering and when doctors here told me there is nothing we can do for you, and the medication will end your life sooner than later.....it would break anyone after being sick 15 years.

And all of this changed from a TV show.....fucking crazy isn't it?

I am confident you have at least heard of
" The Trailer Park Boys" , right? It was an instant cult Canadian  hit. The first ever real life mokumentary about drinking, weed and shenanigans! But underneath all the 'Fuck off Lahey's, joints, and greasy deals to make money, its a TV show about having each others backs no matter what. Sunnyvale Trailer Park is not just a park. It is a community of family, love and acceptance. And all these actors in real life are just that....a family who has each others backs no matter what. And me, yes Tom from London Ontario. A freaking nobody was welcomed into the park with open arms making me feel as one of their own. I went from fan to friend instantly.

Kristen and I, we do not think of them as celebrities. We know who they are. But they are actual friends. I do not say any of this boasting or showboating. We truly care for these people as they have shown way more love to us than we could ever imagine.

If you have not read the last 2 blogs, STOP right now, book mark where you are, go back and read it. It will bring you up to speed today, GO!

Thanks for that. Now you are up to speed.

Literally, on our flight home from NY. I said "Kristen, what do we have planned for your holidays in August?" She said oddly enough, a couple car shows and that is it. Odd because in the last 10 years my wife's time off of 2 weeks holidays has been broken into a day here. a day there for this doctor appointment, this surgery etc. Basically my wife's last decade of holidays has been spent in doctors offices, hospitals so yeah. Lets go to Halifax!. People who used to be friends, don't call, don't visit. The sicker I got the least I heard from anyone. I would see more doctors in 2 weeks than friends in an entire year. It is what it is.

One friend actually said :" What do you do with your day?" Well, lets see. I was down 120 hours last week, you work 40 hours and get overtime. I do not. Being sick is a full time job!. And the government doesn't give me more money for being sicker. Anyway, you get the gist of what I am trying to convey. Don't feel sad. be happy I feel much better!

So we planned the trip. We had some plans to visit Peggy's Cove, possibly PEI, and some other sights.I was in constant contact with Mike Smith, the actor who plays Bubbles. This will be the last time I refer to him in that context. Because Mike is my best friend. I do not need to exploit him, post pictures that are private to us both to prove or appease anyone. Real friends don't exploit each other. But I will tell you this about Mike. He is kinder, nicer and has a bigger heart than any human being I've ever known. It has NOTHING to do with what he is and more so WHO he is as a human being. If you know Mike Smith personally like I do. You are one truly lucky person. He is the most kindest person I have ever known. Not just because he saved my life and gave me life. But the person he is deep down. Smith has helped countless people in his lifetime. God, I hope he isn't pissed or isn't mad that I brag about him because he is so fucking humble he wants zero recognition from anyone for anything. He in all honesty is the most humble person I have ever known. Generous to a fault. A  bigger Beatles fan than me ( I didn't think that could be possible), a human who would stop what he is doing literally to help someone for no reason and go out of his way to make sure no one knows its him. Elvis was like that.

Kristen and I arrive in Halifax and from the moment before the plane landed. I looked out the cabin window, seen the lush green province and immediately my heart felt joy and peace and knew we were home. Not on a trip.

We ended up spending the entire trip with Mike and the family. We fell in love instantly with the family. We gelled instantly. Mike and I have been getting closer over the past few months and I was scared to get there and think : Hand shake from Mike and Hey Bud. I saved your life, here is an autograph and best wishes. Nope. Mike invited us into his life with open arms, including his entire family. I have never ever felt so incredibly welcome and home.We were very fortunate to spend time with his wife's parents who are just fabulous kind loving great hearted people. Mikes dad and their kids. Kristen and I could have cared or less that we chose to miss out on some sights. We were just so happy to be there, spend quality family time with them.

If you know my wife personally. You will know that she is the easiest person going, Happy Go Lucky and has a heart of gold. Meeting Mikes wife was like I met my wife again. The kindest most sweetest  lady I have ever met next to my wife. She is a carbon copy of Kristen, Yet Kristen will disagree and say she is sweeter, nicer and funnier.

If you are hoping to read some intimate moments, I am sorry to advise you but those moments are private and those  memories of us being together are just that. Private. But those 7 days in Nova Scotia, were the absolute best days of my entire life. I did more in 7 days with them than I have done in 10 YEARS! Fact!

I also had some firsts for me in Nova Scotia.
I had a severe fear of open water. Well I still do but its much better.
I went on a sea doo/jet ski. For the first time in my life. I don't even think I seen sea doo in person. I am not sure but if I did. It was not something I was remotely interested then. Now I want one!
First time on a boat in decades.
First Donair
First time wearing cologne in years, as it was a major trigger for headaches. (* when going to a doctors office and the sign says fragrance free. Please adhere to it. A strong smell can trigger a week of suffering*)
First time I had alcohol in 11 years and 8 months. Last time I had a drink I stepped in front of a bus Dec 31,2008 at my first suicide attempt. I never drank a drop since. My first sip of any alcohol was Freedom 35 Beer. And fuck, it was Decent!( I didn't drink by choice)
First time in the Maritimes.
First time having a lobster sandwich. Still unsure if I liked it. Maybe Ill try one more time,
First time being awake at 2:45 am and not in pain!!! Holy shit. Crazy huh!
and the most important thing to me....First time being accepted for who I am with open arms. No one gives a shit who I am and that is perfect. I never wanted pity from anyone. Just friendship.

To me, that is the epitome of what life is about. Relationships. That means way more to me than anything. A very intelligent smart man who I got to spend time with told me verbatim" I don't give a fuck what anyone does for a living, but how you treat people means everything". That same guy then praised Kristen and I for helping others. Something I should start doing which I am terrible at....compliments. I don't like them. But I have to learn to accept them.

So yeah, it was many firsts for me, some even for Kristen. None of my firsts were planned and many I would have said no fucking way. But I did, lived to tell and have new loves because of it. I lived in a bubble for so many years.

The entire trip my health was much better. Only one bad morning and I am sure it was something I ate when I was medicated.Even my wife's tremor in her hand stopped. It actually reduced greatly when we were in New York getting treatment. I know my health affects my wife's health. It is nothing on purpose and neither anyone's fault. When we returned here back to London the tremor returned.

We were very fortunate to go to Swearnet. The home to where everything is created for the Boys. I will tell you that the staff are family related or not. This is a place anyone would work at. All smiles by everyone. A happy positive work environment.

The place is huge, It has to be. They film there. This is where the animated series is made, the show Park After Dark podcast is filmed and many more shows! Go to www.swearnet.com A membership is only $4.20 a month of $40 a year. Time well wasted.

The studio is incredible and what you may think it is. Many different current sets for production and many from the past and many for the future. I personally just love behind the camera as much as being in front of one. The whole filming industry fascinates me. Its why our living room is film themed. The person who creates the sets and props is so incredibly talented. My wife just loves her work. Kristen would love to do that!

I was very fortunate to go to a secret warehouse and see all the Trailer Park Boys vehicles and the famous "Shitmobile". A car that is as legendary as the General Lee and Batmobile. This pile of rotten rust should be in a museum at some point.  I hope it is never crushed. Being a car guy and a true fan of the show, this was one of the biggest highlights for me going to Swearnet to see the cars!

Everyone at Swearnet treated us like gold. They all made me feel like a celebrity. They fulfilled a dream of mine. I don't even think they know. But we made history together. Being able to spread the message and awareness for cluster headache sufferers world wide meant so much to me. Even though I am getting better, I will never forget those who are suffering and struggling to make it through another day. That is what this entire blog page is about., cluster headaches. If I can save a life, help one person with all of this. Give them hope. Then I accomplished what I set out to do by helping people.

I am sure some were hoping to hear some intimate details with Mike, Robb and JP. And I am sorry to say, they are just that. Personal and private moments. Do you plaster pics of your friends showboating on fakebook? I think...there is only 1 photo of Mike and I on fakebook and I didn't ask for the photo nor did I take any photos of us together. I am sure others got pics of us. But I never asked anyone for a photo or autograph because simply. These people are our friends. I am beyond grateful for that.

Kristen and I were fortunate enough to be in the heart of Halifax, see the local culture, experience it, live it, eat it and fell head over heels in love with it. A large muscular man, hehe told me " Maritime life is much different out here. It is a great place to live and a way of life like no other". And he didn't even have to sell me on the idea. I knew landing off the plane this is where we want to be. We are meant to be here.

What is so different to me is London Ontario where we live is so north, east, south, and  west. There its twists and turns and corners, and a million lakes. Making each drive scenic, beautiful and fun! There is no boring stretch of road. I laugh they call London the Forest City. Whoever came up with that should visit Nova Scotia and take that back. Its actually humorous.

While in Nova Scotia we made many life time friendships. People I call friends. People I want to know further. People who share the same values, morals and goals in life. People I would break bread with.  People who want Kristen and I in Nova Scotia. I am sure you can read where this is leading.

My father left Europe on 24 hours notice, and came to Canada with my mother, and 3 year old  with $25 to his name. To have a better life. A better future. My dad said he respects our decision to leave. Which is why Kristen and I are moving to Nova Scotia.

I was born in BC. Lived in Ontario since I was 4 years old and now will spend my remaining life in Nova Scotia. My wife has traveled Canada, Europe and most of her life in Ontario. She is more than happy to leave. She knows we have a future there. A better quality of life not just because of our friends but its cheaper to live there sick. I felt healthier there. And we have a future there. I am 47 years old. I have been so sick for 15 years getting worse every year, actually every day I was getting worse. Mike saved my life and gave me life. And for once in 15 years  I feel better. I don't want to live miserable and stuck in London. We want peace and happiness. I want that for others too, don't we all in life?

That is what I learned on this trip. I got a chance to see how other people live. With respect, courtesy and kindness. With beautiful surroundings no matter which way your head is pointed there. It is lush, serene and beautiful. I get why people flock to British Columbia. It is really heaven on earth there. But it costs so much to live in BC that I would be homeless. The Maritimes is equally as beautiful, for a fraction of the price. In comparison this home we live in is worth $350,000 all day long for a 900 sq ft home. Probably more as the market is hot. This same home with 5 x the size of lot close to the water will run you $265,000. Insurance is half. Just to give you an example. Yet this house in Vancouver would be over a million. Stupid isn't it. My income will never change on disability. It doesn't matter where I live. The amount I live on is the same anywhere, so living cheaper helps us greatly.

This is an opportunity of a life time to leave, to move there and already know people we call family. Actually I think they all called us family before the words came out of my mouth. But feelings are mutual. Mutual love, mutual respect. This is where we are going to call home.

At some point when we get settled. down the road after we move, we want to continue to help the homeless. And maybe. just maybe I will start vlogging again. Who knows. But up rooting my entire life from London to Nova Scotia will be crazy. The logistics, the cost, employment for my wife and leaving.  It is not as simple as moving across town. But if Kristen and I don't do this now. We never will and will regret it for the rest of our life.

Its funny, going to Beverly Hills or Caribbean trips you always say wow, wouldn't it be nice to live like this....and you know deep down it can never happen because of life back wherever your home is. Yet this time, we want and can make this our home.

For the nay sayers, who think that they have 2 weeks of summer and 11.5 months of winter, you are wrong, They have 4 seasons. unlike here where its Winter then dead hot summer. We didn't even have a fucking spring here this year. I will not miss Ontarrible weather.

Will I miss Ontario? I cant speak for Kristen. But nope. My life the last 15 years has been the least bit fun. The so called friends and people I knew here couldn't care or less I am alive. Cowards only honk thinking their childish behavior gets a rise from me. but i'm laughing inside so great thinking Bub Bye.  One day they will be laying in a hospital bed wondering where everyone went. Karma.So nah. no love lost. I'm good. The friends I have here are welcome to come visit us anytime. and chances are they will want to move too.  Nor am I going to gloat at the new life we now have. I knew deep down and told Kristen this trip will change our life forever. I said that as the plane left London. She now agrees with me. Our lives are forever changed. Not just because I feel better. We have a life now. It is in Nova Scotia.

If you get the chance to visit Halifax, and you love great food go to The Economy Shoe Shop. On Argyle Street. Also Sniggily Wigggily's is an excellent live entertainment bar with hilarious comedy nights on Sunday. A bucket list for me one day to write enough material to tell jokes. One day....
The Toothy Moose is another late night hotspot!. Its literally a block and a half from the water front. If taking a ferry over from Dartmouth you can walk off the boat, to the bar in under 5 minutes.  Downtown Halifax is spotless, new, vibrant and exciting. They have designated smoking areas and if you puff puff pass, you will be a ok. A few times I was having a splif and a cop pulled right up to me and smiled. I have not been to a bar since I met my wife. I've had no reason too. But these bars are awesome. Not a single fight, no egos. Those are left at home. Everyone was inviting, warm and welcome. One thing I noted and maybe its the same back here too. But Pride is everywhere in Halifax and it was so nice to see Love is Love. The LGTBQ is welcome in straight bars, and seen it first hand. Its not even a thing there. Like it shouldn't be anywhere. People. That is all they are to me. I am the least bit racist/homophobic person I know. Acceptance is alive and well there and I hope my LGTBQ friends come to visit us. No one gives a crap and that is how it should be. I hope its the same way here.

I look back and literally shake my head how a TV show, yes a TV brought us together, A few years ago I befriended a gentleman who moved from the UK to Nova Scotia to marry the love of his life. They married and two bambino's came along. My friend has been more than supportive with my awareness and helping the homeless. In days I seen dark days which were everyday, he always checked up on me. Always called, left thousands of voicemails making sure I was alive. Having me on his podcast several times as a guest on "Majors Mess Hall Podcast" He has been nothing short of a true friend. I got to finally meet him in person and show him the true dickhead that I am....just kidding. We gelled instantly like Mike and I except Mike and I's relationship is deeper. Simply because he saved my life. But my pal Gav, is just an amazing father/husband and friend. I feel incredibly lucky to have such  a wonderful friend. He is just one of many people who have accepted us. He pulled me aside after our first night and thanked me for not committing suicide and thanked Mike for saving my life. That is the point of this blog today.

It isn't that I partied and had the time of my life with the boys. It is that life can change in a nano second for the better. For 15 years I have lived with the worlds most painful disease. A title I fucking loathe to have. Not one I ever wanted. I survived a suicide attempt, and almost another and  I almost died many times form carbon monoxide, a fall, and an infection after one of my 4 brain surgeries. For 15 years every single god damn day of my life got 1% worse. Add 1% everyday for 15 years it adds up. Strength doesn't come from lifting weights, or a job. It comes from falling down 7x and getting up 8. I m in disbelief when I hear people complain about life that they have yet I prayed for the life they complain about. My ex friends who left me in the hospital and never once cared to see if I was alive. I forgive them for being cowards. But one thing I never lost was integrity.Those cowards don't know what integrity is. I think its what kept me going. To help others, takes the suffering and pain away and I know what it is like first hand to just think to yourself  I just need to make it to midnight mentality" Just get through one more day. When Mike saved my life. I had lost all HOPE. Mike gave me hope and in turn gave me life. And now a new life.

I hope you were not expecting me bragging I was partying with the Trailer Park Boys. Sorry, I will never do that. But I will tell you that Mike, Robb, JP, Pat,Jason and all the families mean more to me than anything. They are not their jobs or titles. They are people that I admire and respect who have careers in the public eye. My time with them will always be private.

To my knowledge, I know I am the only person in the world who has had this many surgeries for clusters and lived the life I have. The relentless pain and suffering for over a decade ad thinking I was going to die in London and think that the rest of my life  was going to be more relentless suffering and hurt from others. That is all changed now. Some human being for no fucking reason other than the goodness of their hearts saved me and wanted zero recognition. Why? No reason, because it was the right thing to do. Did they take note of what Kristen and I have accomplished while sick?. Sure, and that was never my intention that 10 years ago helping to advocate and awareness for cluster headaches, and helping the homeless for  5 years was never my goal to be recognized. It wasn't even a thought. And Kristen and I would keep doing it had we not plan to leave London. Now we will do it in Nova Scotia.

I am sure this blog may come as a surprise to come and some may say I don't blame you I would leave too. I am very proud of my accomplishments in life. I fulfilled a dream and opened my own Hot Rod Barber shop. We helped create awareness locally ad globally for Clusters. The decal was designed by me here in London. I did a lot here. I am proud of the things we done here. But its time to go. Some wont miss us. Those are the people who didn't care I was alive. That is ok. Mike has made up for every single douche bag I have encountered in my life who has fucked me over. We are good. I hold no resentments. I am so happy in life now and will be happier in the very near future.  We will finally have peace in life. It is all everyone wants isn't it?

Let this blog be the glimmer of HOPE you need in times of darkness. Your life can change in a nano second. I am living proof. God, I wish you could see the smile on my face as I write this. I am happy. We are happy. Never give up HOPE.

Thank you for being apart of my journey, peace. And pain free wishes to anyone going through shit.
Check out "Park After Dark" Podcast by The Trailer Park Boys on www.swearnet.com or listen on iTunes. Aug 30,2019 the podcast with me as a guest airs.  Have  a watch / listen. It was a bucket list to be in Sunnyvale. Guess what? We are moving to Sunnyvale!

                                           Watch the Podcast Here! at Swearnet, Click Here




1 comment:

  1. i just read this blog jeez where was i lol very very heartfelt, its wonderful you have a whole new life and family i dont wish sickness on anyone, its just that some people dont have guardian angels around them to help them out so they never can experience the only thing that matters in life and thats your health, so enjoy the ride my friend no bummby roads ahead PS god luck to you and your wife in your new home by the water

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